Troubles in the home front here, a Q&A, translated…
Q: My mother-in-law is hostile toward me, what do I do?
Ms. C, who’d had a long-distance relationship with her husband for nine years, who got married at the end of last year, but now, she’d found, that her mother-in-law didn’t like her wrote me. She said, that her mother-in-law looked after her four sons really well, but, she’s also very bossy in their lives. From before the marriage, when her husband made a bad investment called, she’d called C up, and grilled her, for making him invest; back then, C didn’t think too much about it, felt, that it was merely, a misunderstanding from her future mother-in-law.
But, on the day of the wedding banquet, the mother-in-law stated out her regrets in front of the bride and her families, “had it not been for you, that kept holding on to my son too tightly, I’m sure, that he could find a better wife”, or something like is. C’s family held down their anger, but, the seed of displeasure had, been planted.
The second month after they wed, C got pregnant, the husband bought a house close to his parents’, and, on the weekends, he’d headed back home, to be with his mother. C learned from her husband, that her mother-in-law would call him up ten times a day, to remote control every single detail of his life, including telling C to find work away from home, to help put up the money for remodeling their house, and such.
Later on, because their new property had a leak, the mother-in-law called up the plumbers, and the plumbers said, that they are going to arrive in the evenings to check things out, but C, being pregnant, was fatigued, she’d turned off her cell and took a nap. But, in the noon hours, the in-laws made their unannounced, surprised visit, couldn’t get in, and, couldn’t get through on C’s cell phone, they’d gotten off on a bad note. And, C heard from the brother-in-law, that the mother-in-law had disliked her, ever since before she’d married her husband, and now, her own parents are standing up, telling her mother-in-law, that she wasn’t right, in treating her, that if they don’t stand their grounds, C will have to live like the oppresse4d. C was also prepared, to get into a huge fight with her mother-in-law, it’s just, that she’s unsettled about it on the inside.
A My Opinion
The start of this in-law relationship didn’t get off on the right foot, the husband, and the brother-in-law’s transmitting the messages wrong, the over-intervention from her side of the family, the mother-in-law’s control freak tendencies, and the daughter-in-law didn’t show enough respect toward the mother-in-law either. C should sit down, and have a discussion with her husband, and have him, talk to his own mother, to see if there’s a way, to resolve their differences; at the same time, as the daughter-in-law, C must show some kindness, otherwise, they live close to each other, and this, is only the beginning of the marriage, and she’s already pregnant, if this matter doesn’t get resolved, then, it may affect the marriage. First, you must train yourself, to block out the words of those unrelated to the matter, and, everybody keep control over her/his ears AND mouth, at least, don’t make the situations worse.
This all started, because the mother-in-law believed, that her son can DO better, than this daughter-in-law, and, with that PRECONCEIVED notion, that, sets the relationship off on the WRONG foot, plus, there are so many improper middlemen, the distant relatives, and those who are not, directly related to the matter, chiming in where they’re NOT supposed to, that, is why, this, is getting to where it is, and, the woman is pregnant, and, she turned off her cell, and, the in-law couldn’t get in, and got angry at her? And, all of these matters just escalated, and, it’s on, the verge of BLOWING UP in ALL of their faces!