If you want to do it, then, don’t complaint, and if you want to complain, then, don’t do it, simple as that! Translated…
“My bad fortune came in the elderly years, I’m already eighty, and still had to cook for my daughter-in-law!”, Auntie Man started complaining to Auntie Rong again. Auntie Man’s husband died when she was younger, leaving behind, a pair of young children, and she’d worked as a maid, to raise them up into adulthood years.
Since her son married, Auntie Man started carrying the household chores upon herself, so her son, her daughter-in-law can go to work, and, after her grandchild was born, she’d helped out in raising him up too. Many years later, she’s still responsible, for cooking for her family of five. She said, that she was, cooking for the sake of her grandson, because her daughter-in-law wouldn’t set foot into the kitchens. And, Auntie Man would complain to ALL who will listen to her, and in the end, the words got back to the daughter-in-law’s ears, and, she’d treated her mother-in-law even more coldly, the two of them don’t interact at all.
“So, why don’t you just, stop cooking, and let the family take care of their own meals; if you still want to cook, then, don’t complain. You must think, of how your daughter-in-law would feel, as she’d heard these gossips about her too, that would, make her lose face, right? You need to be glad, that you’re still, very able-bodied, how many friends of yours had, passed away and died? You’re more than blessed, to be able to, take care of your own daily living, you are, very blessed!”
After Auntie Rong got through to her, Auntie Man’s moods finally, lifted up, and no longer complained to the neighbors about, how she was, taking care of all the meals of her family, and, the relationship of her and her daughter-in-law improved as well.
So, in this case, the problem rests in the mother-in-law, she doesn’t want to cook for her entire family, and yet, she still did it, and complained about it, and, her complaints got into her own daughter-in-law’s ears, and that, was why her daughter-in-law got on bad terms with her, but, since the friend/neighbor helped the woman see things a different way, she’d stopped complaining, and, as she’d stopped complaining, her relationship with her daughter-in-law improve, and, what do you think that showed? Exactly!