Being different, and finally, slowly, coming into acceptance, of one’s own physical conditions, translated…
I was, diagnosed with vitiligo, and been in treatment for over three years up to date.
Actually, having this condition really doesn’t affect my overall health status, but, there would be, patches of white, irregular-shaped chunks that showed up on my skin. And, if the chunks were so place apparent, then, it’d caused me to become, the center of attention. And, the curiosities, interests shown toward my condition, even making fun of the way I appeared, had always, caught me, off guard each and every time.
My white spots were located around my ears and neck, and when I was quite young, I’d not, minded it at all, but as I got older, the area grew larger, and became more, and more, noticeable, plus, the friends, relatives, and those I knew would show concerns from time to time, along with the strangers’ looking at me weird, I’d started, feeling more and more self-abased, worried, that I’d, looked like a monster in other people’s eyes.
At first, I was, naïve to believe, that I’d only needed a year’s worth of treatments, to get rid of it completely, for once and for all, but, it’d been, over three years to date, but, the patches only, shrunk in size by a little bit. And as my stresses from day to day grew, and I’d needed to, head to the hospitals to get treated, my patience became, spent, by all of my negative moods, and I’d, wanted to give up the treatment procedures, but, I couldn’t, walk out into the world, with my white spots, and face everyone else in the world, and so, I can only, grit down my teeth, and continue on in treatment.
Sometimes, I’d wondered, did I do something awful, so God felt compelled, to brand me, with these, white markings on my body? In the nights, I’d, bowed my head down to God, vowed, that I will, change my ways, to NOT be as aloof as I’d always been to the outside world, prayed, that he could, stop torturing me. But, as I’d realized, that praying to God doesn’t do SQUAT, I’d started crying in the nights, and, blamed the heavens for giving me this misfortune in life, and, blamed the world for being, so unfriendly.
But, after all these years, I’d slowly, walked out of the gloom, because, I’m not the only one who’s, suffering, my family needed to take me to the hospitals for treatment, and, after their hard days of work, they’d needed to, keep the energies up, to take me to the hospital, and, seeing how there are, little to no improvements to my conditions, they’re, stressed out too. And, how can I, keep on, living in self-pity, and affecting their moods endlessly too? Isn’t this the time, that I should, flash my radiant smiles at them?
I’d rarely, disclosed my condition actively to others, and I’d often, hidden myself, mask myself up, hoping, that nobody sees that I’m, different. But, now I’d, bravely, decided, to write it all out, so more can see, hoping, that it helps bring about more understanding between people in the world, then, the next time, you all come face to face, with those who are, biologically, or psychologically different than you, then, you can, show them more tolerance, and respect too.
I, am not weird, just like you, I’m, an ordinary person too.
And so, this, is how long it’d taken, for this person, to see herself as is, because her physical conditions, she’d felt that she was, inferior to everybody else in the world, because of her conditions, she’d, felt troubles from before, because people who don’t know her kept inquiring, and it’d, caused her stress, but now, after seeing how much her family was, putting in, to take care of her, she’d, decided, to change her perceptions of her own condition, and, it’d, helped her, adapt better, because at least, she’s, slowly, coming to, accepting herself as is, and, that, is the MOST important thing of all, accepting yourselves, because if you don’t, how can you ask the rest of the world to, and this woman, had already, taken her very FIRST step toward becoming, a better version of herself!