Burned Out the Love…

That’s it! We’d, burned it out………

Burned out the love, not because we’d, needed the light from it, not because we were, cold, freezing ourselves to death, but just because!

Burned out the love, who knew, that love’s, spent, so easily, huh? I would’ve, never guessed, how fast love can “go” (don’t ask “where”!), how quickly, it’d, turned to ashes…

Burned out the love, it’s, too late, and love is still NO phoenix, it won’t, rise up, and live again, oh no, it’d, just, stayed, dead, and there’s, nothing that you, or I, can do ‘bout that now, is there? Nope!

查看來源圖片a picture of the before and the after, from online…

Burned out the love, why? Because we can, because that, is what, we’re, supposed to do, to experiment with it, to see, how far we can push it, until it finally, CRACKED. Burned out the love, and, there’s, nothing but ashes and dusts that remained, of this, burned up love of ours, and so, I’d, collected my half (as that, is how everything got divided? Right down the middle???), and you can have the rest of the remaining half, to go with that steak, salted with your own tears…………

Burned out the love, so? I got more love than you’ll ever know, and, know the best thing about my love is? It NEVER gets used up, I will always, have MORE than enough love to get by! As for you? Do I, really care? Yeah, uh, you WISH!

Note: this is still just me, throwing things out at this wall of echo, meaning that it’s not directed toward anybody out there, ‘k??? Yeah, uh-huh!

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The Last Trip We Took Together…

That last trip we took together, do you remember it? Of course N-O-T! You’d, left us behind a long, long, long time ago. That last trip we took together, it was, our last draw, the final attempt, to save our marriage, and yet, I’d, realized, for certain, that we shouldn’t, stay married together, and, that last trip we took together, turned out, to be the beginning of our divorce!

That last trip we took together, I can vaguely recall the scenes, we went to this beautiful place (that much I know!!!), we thought that this was what our marriage needed, a vacation for just the two of us, without our parents, our relatives or friends, and children, just us two, to sort things through…

like this???  Photo from online…

And yet, that last trip, was like that first domino that led to the tumbling down of the rest of the lined-up straight dominoes! That last trip we took together, what happened to us? Why did we, fall out of love? I mean, our love was, supposed to last for a lifetime, wasn’t it? So, how come it didn’t, huh???

That last trip we took together, well, glad that was over, huh? ‘Cuz I’m no longer married to you, and, I’d never been, happier in my life, on that very last day of this vacation for two, which led to my life of one!!!

A Porcelain Named “Marriage”

We’d received that wedding present (yup, unfortunately, we still got H-I-T-C-H-E-D here!!!) from, uh, who was it from again???  Doesn’t matter anyways…

It was a wedding day present, and yeah, she just, sat inside that display case it got delivered to us in, looking so pretty, so white-faced, so delicate too, and because “she” was so delicate, so untouched, so clean-looking, we’d decided, to keep this porcelain we came to name “marriage” inside that display case, in the shelves.

the “before” photo…from online…porcelain doll 的圖片結果

Then, as the kids came one by one (yup, we’d reproduced like them rabbits too, don’t you know!!!), and I had one too many abortions to count, as those little ones, came too quickly!

And, as the kids started getting older, they’d started, experiencing the world through their senses (as all kids should be allowed to???), and one day, one of those RUGRATS got her hands, into that display case, where “marriage”, the porcelain lay in her dormancy, and, that daughter of ours, took her out, and, because she still hadn’t mastered her hand-eye coordination completely yet, oopsy, “Marriage”, the porcelain dropped, and shattered!

I ran into the living room, as soon as “Marriage” HIT the floor, “she” made that huge raucous (fine, maybe NOT loud, but I’d, still heard “her” shatter…), and, I told our daughter, to GET away, ‘cuz I didn’t want her to step on the shattered pieces and cut herself, and, as I pushed her aside, and started sweeping up the mess, our daughter started crying…

And I had to, go and calm my baby girl down, told her it was okay, that marriage is now, shattered, and that I knew she didn’t mean to break “her”, that it wasn’t, her fault, but heaven knows how much she’d blamed herself, and she’s, so very young too!

and here’s the “after” photo, still from online…a shattered porcelain doll 的圖片結果

After “marriage” the porcelain shattered into god only KNOWS how many pieces, I’d, replaced “her”, with a ragdoll named DIVORCE, and, after I gained SOLE custody (‘cuz you are NOWHERE fitting as a father to my daughter!), I’d allowed my daughter, to drag, DIVORCE, the ragdoll everywhere with her………

And yeah, someone D-I-E in this tale: it’s that STUPID porcelain named “marriage”!

This World We’d Built Around Us…

This world we’d built around us, to protect us, from the outside noises, and, for a short while (felt like the miniscule of a nanosecond!), it’d worked, and then, all those loud bangs, came into this life we shared, and messed it all up!

This world we’d built around us, it’s, a mirage, a false belief, that we can, keep everything hurtful out, and, it had, worked, for a short while too (b/c we were “covered” by DENIAL!!!), and the, denial RAN out on us, and, everything came crumbling down…

like this???  Photo from online…

This world we’d built around us, what was it for again?  I can’t seem to remember its purpose now.  Or maybe, I can’t remember its purpose, because, I no longer needed, anything, to SHIELD me from all of my FUCKED up past, ‘cuz I got through it already, while you’re still, trapped.

So, this world that’s built around us, is no longer, around “us” (as there was never, actually, an “us”, there’s only me, myself, and I, oh, and you too!!!), you’d erected that wall around your heart so high, I can’t even, get over it, and so, I’d, stopped, trying to, reach you, and you can, die in your own misery for all I care!!!

building a wall around love 的圖片結果a wall, crumbling down, not my animation…

This world we’d built around us, had, served ITS purpose, and now, it’s time, that we, retire this world, back to wherever the HELL it is that it came from, and, move on, separately………

Typewriter, a Short Prose

Things that became, outdated, a metaphor for a marriage, to this character here, translated…

She’d used the typewriter to practice her English keyboarding skills.  But after graduation, the typewriter became outdated.  After that, the computers became more and more advanced by the year, soon enough, she’d, forgotten, that typewriter once, existed in this world.  Until tonight in a movie, she saw a typewriter again, and got reminded of how she’d, spent six months with it, and back then, she’d entered into key entry competitions with him too.  Some say, that not seeing what you forgot means you don’t need it anymore.  After the movie, she was, lost in thought for a very long time…………

The very next morning, she’d called him up, told him she agreed to the divorce he asks her for.

cracked open and broke, so fragile…not my photo…

So, after this enlightening, the woman finally decided, that it’s, time she should, let go of something that’s outdated (not the typewriter, but her own marriage!), and, her remembering using the typewriter was a sort of a nostalgia this woman needed, to find closure to her own marriage, and, after seeing the typewriter in the movie, she’d, found the closure she’d needed, and finally, agreed, to divorce the man she was married to.  It’s a wonder, how something that’s totally unrelated to anything else, can give you such a wakeup call, isn’t it???

 

 

 

The Dance that Never Ends…

There’s that dance that never ends, even AFTER the music had, ceased to exist.

The dance that never ends, we are, engaged in, and this had been started, since the beginning, of everything.  We’re, engaged in this, never-ending tug-of-war, with neither one of us admitting that we can’t win, neither of us, willing to cave!

The dance that never ends, it’d gone on, for years since it started, long, long ago, and now, I’d finally become, too tired to even mumble a single word, or even, make a sound.  The dance that never ends, finally ended, the day they’d, lain me in the ground.

from this, not my photograph…

The dance that never ends, it’s troubling, I know, why two people keep on, torturing each other, in the name of “LOVE”, when there wasn’t an ounce of it to begin with………

The dance that never ends, that, is what this is, and instead of a pas de deux, I’m performing this TANGO, with nobody ELSE but me!!!

The dance that never ends, well, it’d ended all right, after the music had died, the lights turned off, the curtains drawn, the members of the audience, leaving the concert hall, and there’s, just Y-O-U who’s left………so, where am I?  Oh wait, I’d, left the building (just like Elvis!!!).

To this…not my photo still

A Marraige, Beyond Repair…

A marriage, beyond repair, that, is what they ended up, “sharing”…

A marriage, beyond repair, how did it, get to this, huh?  Was it because of something we had done?  Something we didn’t do?  What is it, that’s caused, this originally working (barely!) marriage to get beyond repair, do you know?

A marriage, beyond repair, and seeing how, this porcelain doll called marriage can’t get GLUED back to its originally, unshatttered state, why keep it, huh?  Let’s just, put it (the marriage) out of ITS misery, and make sure, that its sufferings, don’t get prolonged.

a marraige, broken 的圖片結果like this???  Not my photo…

A marriage, beyond repair, how do we decide, when enough IS enough, and that the marriage is no longer, worth the time, or the energy we’d, invested in?  And, what if, one of us still want to try to salvage it, while the other already, threw IN the towels?  What do we do ‘bout it then???

A marriage, beyond repair, well, we need to, patch things up, best as we can, even IF we know, that the marriage is, completely, shattered, into many millions of bits and pieces, so we can, both feel better, about, not being the one, to quit before its time-of-death!

A marriage beyond repair, that’s just it, I see no future, not for me, staying, STUCK in this no-longer-my-priority marriage, and so, I took the liberty, and went ahead, filed for divorce, without YOUR “consent” (as IF I’d needed “consent” to get divorced from you???)………besides, I’m the only one here, previously, working so god DAMN hard, trying, to keep this marriage of ours (it was, you DO realize that, don’t you???) going, and now, I’m done!