Romanticism vs. Practicality, Between a Husband & a Wife

When Ms. Romantic meets Mr. Practical, look at the SPARKS that flew!!!  On how they’d, interacted with each other in marriage, translated…

He was once, such, a romantic man, as he’d served in Hualien, he’d gone to the beaches, picked the ginger lilies, recorded the sound of the waves, hitting the shores, express mailed it to middle Taiwan.  As I received his love letter, I’d heard the waves, which turned into his sweet whispers into my ears, and on the pure white flower petals, the dews still, fresh, the aromas were, very comforting, and, my heart was, his.

Even after we were wed, his romantic gestures didn’t stop.  On our second anniversary, he’d used his lunch hour, came home, arranged a bundle of roses, with a pink card, wrote his love and blessings for me in English, and asked me out to a dinner date; as I came home from work and saw this surprise, the waves of bliss took over me, I was, so very, moved by his gestures!

And yet, my romantic gestures only, stayed on the verbal front, “How intelligent you are?  It’s wonderful, to have you as my husband!” my willingness to cook, and clean, and bend over to pick up each and every one of his socks, was MY practical way of replying to his romantic gestures toward me.

But, when had, our roles switched, last year, I’d injured myself, had cholecystitis, his romanticism turned to practicality.  He’d taken me to the hospitals, I’d waited for a whole day, the long, never ending wait, drove me nuts, he’d still, kept calm, took care of me, took me to the bathrooms, to get a drink, wheeled me around the hospital, for the X-rays, the ultrasound, the blood test, had a conference with the anesthesiologist, didn’t get his lunch until four in the afternoon.  I was truly grateful for him, he’d told me, that because we are to stay together until the very end, our health and being there for one another, is the most important of all, that was, his, practical side.  After we got home, he’d, started, snoring on the couch, fast asleep, I’d, brought over a thin quilt, to keep him warm, and, gave him, a gentle peck on the cheeks, this was, my romantic gestures, toward his taking care of me.

Aftermy surgery, the doctor told me to stay off greasy foods, I’d had, nothing but bland,plain foods by the day, like that monk from the hero’s tale, “I can puke outbirds now I don’t taste anything!”, finally, my birthday came, I’d, imagined tohave a candlelight dinner, but he’d, followed the doctor’s orders for me, andso, my “birthday celebration meal” was, porridge with steamed vegetables, for abetter and longer future, I’d, caved to, his practicality.

查看來源圖片
like, this???  Photo from online

On the day we had the meal, I’d, looked into his eyes lovingly, said, “hey, there are some silvers, mixed in with your black, you look good!”, and made fun of myself, “because there’s love that I feel, so, you look handsome in any sense!”, he was, so focused on eating his food, said to me, “Focus on eating your meal, don’t get distracted, it’s not good for your digestion!”

Yep, so, the two of you are very matched, one of you being practical, the other one, romantic, and, the two of you, balanced each other out, complimented each other, because, if you only have romance, that gets you nowhere, and if you are too practical, then, life becomes, kinda dry, so, it’s a good thing, that your romanticism matched up with your husband’s practicality!

Advertisements

Expressions of Love

The changes in your behaviors, in your ways of expressing the love, after your daughter was born, translated…

My daughter was the firstborn in three generations, and so, she’d, received ALL our love.  From when she started to understand things, we’d, not held back on the way we’d expressed our love for her, we’d often say to her, “You’re so wonderful, come to daddy for a hug!”  “You’re, so wonderful, come, grandma give you a hug!”  “Thank you cleaning up your room, mommy loves you, so very much!”

As she’d heard these expressions of love from us, she’d, slowly, started, learning to express the love too.  Sometimes, as she was, using video conference with her two aunts who live away, she’d said, “I love you so, aunt.”  Or, “aunt, when are you coming home?  I miss you so very much!”

查看來源圖片like this???  Photo from online

Actually, my family and I, weren’t that expressive about love at all, before my daughter was born, I’d, held a family meeting, and decided, to show my daughter my love bravely, that way, she’d known, how to, express her love to others, and how to get along well with others too.

Although it’d, felt, a bit, awkward from the start, but, after I gave it a few tries, it’d, become, easier.  And now, as I saw my wife doing the household chores, I’d shown her my gratitude too.  After I’d learned to express my love, naturally, I’d become, a gentleman, like how that night as I was, washing my daughter’s dirty shirt, at the age of a little over two, she’d told me, “Daddy works so hard, I love daddy so!”  Hearing her words so sweet, it’d felt, that no matter the hardships, it’s, all more than, worth it!

See how a young child can, change everything in your life, because this father wanted his young daughter to feel and know that he loves her, he’d started, learning to express his love to her, physically and verbally, which was what he was, never exposed to, and yet, after he’d started expressing his love verbally and physically to his young child, it all came, naturally, and became the only way he knows, of interacting with his loved ones.

Going to See the Oceans

There’s, that intimate connection to the oceans that this man feels, and it’s, with a just reason too!  Translated…

Since I was a child, I’d loved, looking at the oceans, I live very close to the oceans, and, a little ways off from those white sandy beaches, and a little bit farther over those small hills, that was, my hometown.

When we were younger, as the children played hide-and-seek, I’d, climbed onto the rooftops, and, accidentally, discovered that ocean that’s, very close to where I was, that I got a perfectly, unobstructed view to it on the rooftop; it was, really peaceful, the colors of the skies, matched up with the colors of the oceans, the fishing boats looked like small dots on the oceans, the seagulls soared up above, and, there would be planes that flew by, leaving behind, a trail of, white smokes, and it’d become, picturesque, so beautiful.  I sat on the ridge of the rooftops, holding tightly to the ridges, I was, fazed.  Game’s over, but I still, couldn’t, leave where I was.

like this???  Photo from online…查看來源圖片

Later on, my mother told me, that my father works in the Philippines, that it was, to the south side of the far end of the horizons.  From when I was born to age ten, I’d never seen my father, because of the war with Japan, don’t know when my father is to return, and so, every time I had nothing to do, I’d, climbed up onto the roofs, to look at the oceans.  The world is, so serene, I’d, allowed my thoughts to, saturate, as I’d, missed my father, somewhere off, in the farthest end of the skies, what he was doing now, I’d, gotten into deep thought, and, my thoughts wondered, looking at the far end of the horizons, do you know that I exist, my father?

I’d always envied the families with a father in it, imagined the love of my father for me, but, it’s all, up to fate, and I still, never got the chance, to feel the love from my father, as, he’d died, overseas.

Even as I got older, I’d still, loved, watching the seas, and I’d, sent my sentiments of nostalgia to the farthest end, imagined, that we will one day in the future, meet up, in heaven.  Seeing the seas from afar, so peaceful, and as the waves rolled closer into shore, they’d become, harsher, hitting the rocks, life is like the oceans too, with the waves big, and small.

And so, this, is why this person enjoyed, going to the beaches to watch the oceans, because there’s, something missing, out of his life, his father, who was, at the far end from where he was, and that, is why he’d, gone to the beaches to watch the waves as a kid, to send his thoughts of missing his father out through the ocean waves, hoped that it can, reach his father somehow…

Photos of the Family…

Having these photos, still paled, by comparisons from having each other’s company, translated…

Modern day people, with their cell phones in hand, photos are taken so easily, but, if these photos have the heat attached to them, there would be, more values to them.

which would you prefer, this???  Photo from online…查看來源圖片

The children of my uncle are both married, there’s, just the him and his wife living at home now.  His daughter works in the U.S., rarely had the time to visit Taiwan; their son is also, busy at work, and can only take his wife and children home once a month.  He’d gotten the photos of their family vacations developed, and saved them inside a letter sized photo album.

My aunt who’s now demented will flip through the album at least once a day, and sometimes, she’d pointed to herself in the picture, and asked people around her, who that is?  While my uncle wasn’t the least bit interested in the photos.  As his daughter-in-law told him from before, it took them a lot of money, to have all the photos developed, and my uncle told me privately, that compared to the photographs, he’d preferred that his son can visit him at home more often, or give him a call.  That would have, more heat than these, cold photos!

or this???查看來源圖片

With the advancements in technology, no matter how advance, it still, can’t replace the face-to-face interactions of people.  The photos can only keep the memories, but, they can’t, keep the time that we have with our loved ones.  If we can, take less pictures, spend more time together, the memories saved inside our minds, that, is what’s, most precious.

This, is too true, isn’t it, would you rather, have the photos of all your children, grandchildren, surrounding you, so you can flip through those albums every single day, to remember the times you’d spent together, or, would you rather, have your kids and grandkids around you, to physically interact with?

The Gifts of Surprise from My Husband

The gifts this woman received from her husband, it’s still, the HEART that counts, more than what she’d, received from him, translated…

At the start of the month, my husband came to me with a package, with that mischievous smile, said, “here, consider this, a Mother’s Day Present”. It was still, over fifteen days from Mother’s Day, I’d, looked at this package, with unknown content, flashed my awkward smile at him, and, I was, reminded of how, he’d, surprised me from before.

One day, he’d placed a bar of soap looking all excited on my desk, told me, “here, the soap is made with nanotechnology, it can clean things deeply, take away the dirt, it’s also, antiseptic, can become this protective film on your hands, it’s, from the newest nanotechnology.” It was, as if, I was, hearing an infomercial, I’d thought, “How dirty am I, that I’d, needed something like this, to wash myself”, I’d, rebutted, “I don’t CARE what special effects it had, I only care about if I smelled! And, why did you, give me soap?” At this time, he’d, stuttered, “Didn’t you tell me you liked the various scented soaps? Happy Valentine’s Day!”, I’d, gazed over at the calendar on the walls, and, it’d, hit me.

illustration from the papers online…圖/黃鼻子

There was once more, after my husband returned from his business trip, he’d, pulled out a small box as he came home, to give to me, I’d, opened up the box, and, gazed at the necklace with the pendant, and, I’d, pondered, that the object looked, like an animal, and, my son moved in, and stated, “Why is this duck so black?”, my husband immediately leapt up, stated, “How can this be a duck? The neck of a duck is way shorter, it’s a swan, can’t you see, the longer neck on it?” He’d gloated, “You’d told me, that your necklaces turned black after you’d worn it for long, but, this black swan is originally black, so, even if it’d become rusted, you can’t tell!”, after I’d heard, should I not, laugh hysterically, at how well-thought out it was of him?

Coming back to that package in my lap, I’d, opened it, it was, a navy blue piece of cloth, as I’d, tried to figure out what it was, my husband started, doubting what he’d, bought, and, immediately, searched for that photo that’s, caught his eyes online, it took him some time, to finally find the display on a model, and, I’d, put it on, but, as soon as my daughter saw, she’d, pointed at me, said, “Mom, you are, wearing an apron?” Don’t know if it was that I’d lacked that flair, or if the clothes were, mistaken for something else, anyways, the two of us, started laughing, with my husband, lost, in his own mistakes.

In the days of getting mixed in with the nitty-gritty of life, it’s, easy to construe our partners into another us, and, we’d, taken things for granted, and, life became, nothing but routines. And yet, these surprise gifts from my husband became like a “pause button”, in the interesting misunderstandings, I saw his true heart, and, we’d, both gotten, reminded of how important we are, to each other in life.

I’d, found one day, put on that mysterious skirt with the suspenders, put on the black swan necklace, seeing how satisfied my husband looked when he gazed upon me, like he was, seeing a world class beauty!

And so, this, is how thoughtful the husband was toward this woman, he’d wanted to give her something to show her that he loves her, and, there were, times when she’d, misunderstood him, and, yet, it still, didn’t take away from the love the man showed toward his own wife.

He Had Closed Up His Store, to Accompany His Own Younger Brother to School, to Help Him Live the Dreams of Going to College

The love this man has for his younger brother, willing to put up the shop he’d owned and operated, to help him live his dreams, it’s, truly, amazing! From the Front Page Sections, translated…

The graduate of the applied math department from Chiayi University was diagnosed with spinal muscular atrophy, his older brother by twelve years, Nai-Wei Kuo entered into college with him four years ago, took care of his living. As the school hosted its graduation ceremonies, Kuo received the award of being a good student; while his older brother, although not a formal student, the university still gave him a “Friends-Brother Award”, to applaud how close the siblings are.

郭乃誌對桌遊有興趣,曾在嘉大主辦桌遊活動,哥哥郭乃維在一旁當助教。圖/郭乃誌提供in the extracurricular activities together, photo from UDN.com…

Kuo was born with the conditions, but he’d, never given in to his own fate, after he passed the entrance exams for the university, he’d gone to the classes on time, never missed a day, and, worked toward his five-year college degree, and, worked as a part-time help as they data entry in the student center, to broaden his social circle.

The parents of these young men are in business, they are economically well. Four years ago, Nai-Ji Kuo passed the entrance exam and got accepted into the Chiayi University, his older brother decided to close his vegetarian food shop at the malls, and entered into the university alongside his younger brother, to take care of his daily living, along with the three meals.

Chiayi University stated, that Kuo worked hard, to live in the moment, had been awarded the scholarships each and every semester. His older brother was even more outstanding, just kept giving to him, without any complaints, that he needed to get noticed for it.

After Kuo graduated from the university, he’d, gone on into the graduate department, and, his brother will be, accompanying by his side, fighting this “war with mathematics” for the next two years. He said, in the future, whatever his younger brother wanted to learn, he will be, right there besides him, in his pursuits.

國立嘉義大學應用數學系大四生郭乃誌患有先天脊椎性肌肉萎縮症,長他12歲的胞兄郭乃...going to the classes togehter, photo from UDN.com…

And, this is the devotion of this man toward his younger brother, because his younger has a dream, he’d, stopped everything he was doing for his own life, to help his younger brother live his dreams, and, it’d, made the younger brother’s dreams of attending university come true, and, they will be, going to grad school together next!

Taking Mom to See the Seas

So little, what mothers really wanted, such simple wishes, and yet, it’d, taken this long, for the woman, to finally live it! Translated…

My mother is a traditional woman from an agricultural background, in her mind, there’s only her husband and her children, she’d, worked hard for the sake of her family, she’d often told, that her biggest wish was that all of her children and grandchildren are healthy, and there’s, nothing she’d, wanted.

a photo from the trip they took together…from UDN.com…圖/劉秀芳(高雄三民)

For long, I kept thinking, that my mother had no other hobbies or interests, other than going back home, she’d, never been anywhere else, plus she couldn’t ride a scooter, didn’t know how to take the public transportation systems, her social circle, is only riding her bicycle to the marketplaces to shop around. And we’d believed that it’s her ordinary day-to-day living, never thought about bringing her someplace special.

One day I was sitting by her watching T.V. at home, the T.V. showed the beautiful shorelines, she’d stared at the screen for a very long time, then, asked me, “there’s water by the oceans, right?”, I’d asked her if she wanted to go? She’d nodded her head, timidly, said she’d always wanted to go see the oceans, but we’re, too busy, she’d not felt right, troubling us, and said, that her spirits would be lifted as she sees the oceans.

Ahhhhhhhhhh! This was that story from our schooling years of how mom loved the head of the fish, turns out, our beliefs were, completely, wrong. I’d already, contacted my eldest sister, this Mother’s Day, we’re, taking her to see the oceans, to fulfill her long-time wish, and, whenever we have the time, we’d, all take her to see the oceans now.

And because the past generations of women aren’t like us, so outspoken, they usually, kept what they wish for locked up deep inside their minds, and, every once in a while, they would, toss out these “hints”, hoping that those around them can catch it, and this time, this woman caught it, and, made her mother happy!