Writing Each Novel Was Like Destroying My Own Body, and Building it Back Up Again

How getting ill was this writer’s realizing that he needed to change his way of writing, on discovering the self, from the Front Page Sections, translated…

From his twenties, to now, the writer Yi-Jun Luo had weathered through depression and long-term insomnia, in the past three years, he was overcome with three serious illnesses, and last year, he thought he didn’t have long to live. As he was called that he’d own the writing awards, he said it was, “shocking” and “confusing and moving”, “This was the never-before happening moments in literature, with the good novels coming out one by one, I’m glad, to be in this time of literary growth, I hope to melt like a cube of sugar into the era, to share my knowledge with those who shared my love for writing.”

Lo who is an Aries, described himself as a Neanderthal, with the primal instincts, starting at age twenty, he’d started to worship the trends of western modern novels since the 80s and 90s. And yet, those who’d, “grown up drinking the poisonous western modern novels”, a lot of his generation had, committed suicide, or died with illnesses, like his best friends, Yuan, Huang, and Chiu, and many others.

Lo said, in recent years, he’d fallen ill many times, and slowly, come to understand, that he’d needed to prepare the materials from outside his own areas of expertise in writing of the novels, it’s like how the athletes, being engaged in long-term extreme sports, it would be, damaging to the physical health. And yet, he’d, burned out his brain repeatedly, and, causing his nervous system to be in a feverish state.

As he’d spoken on the highly remarked “Western Summer Hotel”, he’d admitted that half way into writing it, he had a relapse of his depression, and when he returned, he’d forgotten, the structures of the story, and as the volume became a book, there were, regrets. For the decade that followed, he’d been taking sleeping pills to help him rest, and felt, “I think my I.Q. is a lot lower compared to ten years ago.”

Last year, Lo suddenly passed out while walking, after being taken to the hospital, he’d learned there were, damages to his cardiac muscles, and, other than thinking about his own loved ones when he fell, he thought, “I still owe myself a very good long novel.” Later on, his instructor, Yang suggested he look at some eastern paintings, to see how they’d, kept themselves steady, when their world is collapsing, to find that method, to keep himself steady. And now, as Lo looked at the paintings, the chinas from the Song Dynasty, touching the rock with the natural marks, he’d felt, at ease and calm, and found, that “the eastern of what he’d, ignored, was like the roots of the soul”, and stopped battling death using the western methods anymore.

Lo said, the three novels that the critic, Wang commended on, each one he’d written it with the mind of destroying himself, then rebuilding himself back up again. And now, he’d hoped, to find a milder method of writing, and continued laboring in literature using the heartfelt, genuine ways, to bring back the terms that modern day man overlooked, such as “respect” and “forgiveness”.

And so, that, is this writer’s journey, to finding a better way to write, in the past, he’d, written using that brute force, which worked, back when he was younger, because he had too much energy to burn out, but, he couldn’t, write like that anymore, as he’s, older, and, it’d, tried his mind, made him sick, and so, he’s, slowly, learning a brand new way, to write…

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A Local Young Man from Bitan Gave Up His High Salary at a Firm, and is Now, Living His Dreams of Entrepreneurship, Making the Dragon Boats

林子鈞放棄百萬年薪,就為了堅持他的龍舟夢。 記者陳珮琦/翻攝

the man, very  enthusiastic about what he does for a living, and that, is the key to his success!

This man realized, that there’s, MORE important things than making the high pays, that it is, more important, that he enjoys, doing what he loves for work! From the Newspapers, translated…

Who says that only on Dragon Boat Festival can you row the dragon boats? The only and first sports company focusing on the dragon boat races, “Seeker”, uses the customizations of the courses, it’d, started up the trend of the companies’ interest in the activities.

The company, “Seeker”, hidden in the old shopping streets of Bitan in Hsintien, is the very first, and ONLY sports company that trains the dragon boat racers, its founder, Dzi-Jun Lin is a child who’d grown up by the side of Bitan, every time he’d recalled how the earlier years of his life when the dragon boat races, involving tens of thousands of participants, it’d, roused up his dreams of becoming a dragon boat rower too, and so, a year ago, for the sake of his own dreams, he’d given up on his million-dollar salaries, and set up “Seeker”, the water sports company.

“Seeker” means “seeking a dream”, with an MBA, when Lin studied in the U.S., he’d gone on the dragon boat races sponsored by the enterprises in Taiwan, all around the U.S. to compete, “there are the races being held year-round in the U.S.”; later he’d started working in Taiwan for two years, and although he’d made around a million dollars annually, “but I was unhappy”, because his dream of racing the dragon boat still lived inside of his mind, and so, he’d, quitted his job, went to China, to observe the developments of the dragon boat races in China, and saw enormous potentials, and decided, to turn his dreams into action.

“Because of that sense of cohesiveness”, Lin told, that the reason why the dragon boat races are so attractive was “it takes everybody onboard the boat to work together, the racers hearts needed to beat as one”, and because many of the workers from various companies, who’d started racing the dragon boats, fell in love, they’d not set up the groups on their own, with their own teams, and they’d even, bought the boats to race for practice on their own.

Lin said, that the establishment of his company, “Seeker”, not only provided the trainers, the equipment, the boat that the races needed, it’d also appealed to the outstanding watersports competitors to sign on, so they can put their skills to good use, and it’d taken this celebratory competitive sport toward a global realm as well.

So, because this young man loved the sport so very much, and he saw the potentials of setting up the establishment for the sport, he’d, followed through the steps, to make his own dreams come true, and that just showed, that if you have a dream, you should, go out, and pursue it, given that your dreams, don’t hurt anybody else.

Flustered

You broke me!…查看來源圖片like this???  Sketch found online…

From a blog in Chinese I’m a subscriber to, translated, by me…

On the Green Pastures

I’d, Lost My Self

During the Long & Winded Season of Rain

I’d, Allowed Myself Go

On a Night, Populated, by No Other

查看來源圖片hurt, doesn’t it???  Sketch found online…

Thought I Could, Forget………

But I’d Become, Red-Eyed

the Moment I’d, Met You

You’d, Walked Right Through Me

I Know I Should, Give Up

But, I Stood Still

in the Crossing

Staring, at Your Backside

And so, this, is how someone TORTURES oneself, the person your in love with no longer loves you, but you can’t, quite let him go yet, and, there’s, nothing you can do, but to just, wait, and cry, as hard and as frequently as you may need to, until one day, that person, no longer roused up any sort of an inkling of an emotion from you again, then, you’d, successfully, gotten over the person!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Flustered

From a blog in Chinese I’m a subscriber to, translated, by me…

On the Green Pastures

I’d, Lost My Self

During the Long & Winded Season of Rain

I’d, Allowed Myself Go

On a Night, Populated, by No Other

Thought I Could, Forget………

But I’d Become, Red-Eyed

the Moment I’d, Met You

You’d, Walked Right Through Me

I Know I Should, Give Up

But, I Stood Still

in the Crossing

Staring, at Your Backside

And so, this, is how someone TORTURES oneself, the person your in love with no longer loves you, but you can’t, quite let him go yet, and, there’s, nothing you can do, but to just, wait, and cry, as hard and as frequently as you may need to, until one day, that person, no longer roused up any sort of an inkling of an emotion from you again, then, you’d, successfully, gotten over the person!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Maybe, It’s Time, We Said, “Goodbye”…

I’d, given it, a lot of thought, that maybe, it’s time, we said, “goodbye”…’cuz, we are, NOT good for each other, but, knowing that, is till can’t help but feel, that strong attraction toward you, and I don’t know, how to, turn it off!

Maybe, it’s time, we said, “goodbye”…before either one of us gets damaged completely, beyond repair? But, we can’t, we’re, too entangled, in body, mind, soul, and heart, to part, and as you, draw me in, I felt, very good, but at the same time, that sense of panic, arose!

Maybe it’s time, we said, “goodbye”…yeah, it’s, for the best, we weren’t, quite right for one another anyhow, and, staying together will only, cause more damage to both of us, and so, I have to be, the stronger one, to PULL the plugs while I still can.

Maybe, it’s time, we said, “goodbye”…staying together won’t do us any good! After all, I already, SAW into the future, and it ain’t, pretty one bit!!!

 

The Macaroons of My Childhood

How you came into being, and, what those childhood experiences meant to you right now, translated…

I was a captain, of the “Gourmet and Beauties Association” when I was a child.

My mother loved breads, and every time she passed by a bakery, she’d gone in to buy something, the breakfasts that we had were mostly, bread or cakes with milk. But, growing up, I’d, hated the breads, the pastries, I’d loved something with a stronger flavor, like McDonald’s, ice cream, chips; but, every time my mother took me to shop in the bakeries, I’d needed to, get that three-colored traditional cakes.

The best part about this cake was the chocolate sprinkles, but reason why I wanted it, wasn’t because of its taste, but because of the way it looked, it’s, very colorful! Back then, I’d, especially loved the foods with the bright colors, everything from my attire, to my foods, needed to be, colorful. (my favorite color back then, as I’d remembered, was pink, so I’d loved, the cotton candies of that color too!”

查看來源圖片remember all of these?  So, which one’s your favorite???  Photo from online…

As I ate the tri-colored cakes, I’d needed to, split the squares up with my hands and eat (but as I enjoyed the cotton candies, I’d needed to, go face in!) and as we’d bought the cakes, I’d, started eating on the way, then, get the cakes all over me, and that’s when mom would say, “I’m not getting it for you again.” Actually, I’d, forgotten what the cakes tasted like, they’re, so ordinary.

And when I wanted to reminisce, I’d, bought a piece, and, I’d always, waited until I arrived home, set it on a plate, then I was, able to, enjoy it. This cake, tasted just as I’d remembered it to, like that traditional tastes and the buttery tastes; not like the French pastries, not like the English scones, it was, the flavor of my mother’s favorite cakes—my mother loved sweets, but, refused to spend any money, and she’d loved buying that bag of “cake sides”. I’d loved it when I was a child, it’s just, I’d only, selected the chocolate flavored pieces. And, on this very day, I’d finally realized, so that was, what memory tasted like.

I worked in Beijing last week, on the very last day, I’d had, the classic lamb hotpot, and had, the traditional sesame baked pastries. Before I left, I’d had the restaurant pack twenty of those so I can take them back, plus a bag of rice crispy treats, and I’d, carried them back here, to my parents. For them, that traditional taste of the flour, was closest to their memories.

I’d asked my students, what their most memorable item of childhood was, I’d received a ton of names for the items, and, not one of them coincided with other students’. I’d looked on, and felt it was, interesting, there were, so many stories attached to these items, and I’d found suddenly, compared to the love stories, the childhood may be, even more colorful. Back when we were young, the very first time we got picked on (or the first time we’d picked on someone); the first time we were, betrayed by our best friends; first time we’d experienced loss…………all of these, small beans were, forced down our throats, and, at first, they may, get STUCK on their ways down, and, the more serious became, the shadows of our childhoods, and, it may take us, until we finally grow up, to sort through them.

all the “essentials”, covered here!  Photo from online…

“Remembering childhood” and “Remembering our pasts”, was totally different. Remembering the past to me, was like still hung up on the self at a period in my life, and those whom I couldn’t, quite let go yet. But remembering my childhood, was using dissociation, to really, look, at how I became, who I am today. My childhood is, unicolored, sometimes, a bit darker, sometimes, lighter. But, the details, as I’d, examined them closely, they were, all very, colorful.

Being so sensitive toward foods, it’s, caused by my elders. They’d never cared about my school performances, they’d not cared if I was in a bad mood, they only always asked me, “Did you eat yet?”

And so, the reason why you’re so insistent about food, probably has something to do with your family, because that was how they’d, shown care for you, asking if you’d eaten, and, somehow, you’d, internalized that, and, as you grew older, you’d, become, more intrigued with the items of food that reminded you of a time, when you felt cared for and loved by your families.

Burn, Small Universe

It took you, forever, to build up to this particular moment, and yet, you’d still, CHICKENED out!!! Translated…

Every boy, when he was young, he would imagine that he’s a super hero, and I’d, always wanted to be Saint, Seiya.

and here are the  characters from that cartoon…from online…查看來源圖片

As we were selecting our spot for the honeymoon, my wife wanted a romantic trip to Greece, I’d naturally, agreed. But, I didn’t care about Mykonos, Santorini, I’m only there, for the Parthenon! As a Seiya fan, how can I never go to, the hometown of, Athena?

That day when we went to the sight, as the tour guide introduced to us, the histories of Athens, my wife was in awe at how majestic the Parthenon was, while the other tourists were busying, taking pictures, I kept thinking, that my childhood dream was, about to, come true.

I shall, stand right before the Parthenon, and, show off the fighting pose I’d practiced for over ten years on end, and, as I throw the punches, I will be, screaming, “Burn, small UNIVERSE!”, my dreams of over twenty years ago, is about to come true on this very day, and, this small secret disclosed itself, with the smile that’s, slowly, crawling onto my face.

As my wife noticed, she’d asked me, “What are you so happy about?”

As my wife had asked, shall I, have her, tape record me? I’d, wondered.

“What, are you smiling about?”, she became, fazed.

posing, at the Parthenon, photo from online…查看來源圖片

“Of course, it’s this trip with you. Yeah, by the way, did you know, that the Goddess of Victory was, NIKE………”

Oh well, perhaps not, I don’t have the guts, it’s, simply, too, embarrassing for me to do it!

And so, this man made the very WISE decision, to NOT make a fool of himself, risking his wife getting angry at him on their honeymoon, which might (or might not!) lead to her giving him the silent treatment for the rest of the trip………

The Nostalgia Runs Long, Like a Flowing River

His father’s old clothes, as a reminder of the love of his parents, now that his parents are, gone, translated…

It was, a few months after my father-in-law passed away, while we were back home, my mother-in-law sorted through my father-in-law’s clothes, had her sons pick a few, as memorabilia. The rest of his siblings turned it down, said it wasn’t necessary, told my mother-in-law immediately, took back all the clothes for recycling, or donated the items to the needy. My mother-in-law wasn’t willing to, with her sorrowful eyes, looked toward my husband for console, my husband took the clothes from her, like holding something treasured, told her that they’re all very new, and that he shall, keep them to wear. My mother-in-law didn’t say another word, walked back into her bedroom, but, she seemed, to feel comforted by my husband’s actions.

查看來源圖片something this ordinary, with so much sentimental values attached, photo from online…

Actually, my husband was one size larger than my father-in-law, and, those clothes became, too short at the sleeves, the pant legs for him, he’d asked me, to pack all of it up, to bring them home with us, I’d guessed, it was, to help make my mother-in-law feel better!

In a blink of an eye, my mother-in-law had passed on for many years. And, my husband missed his parents more and more by the day, and, as he’d talked of my mother-in-law, he’d felt emotional, recalled all the fun things that happened between him and his mother when he was just a young child, a second ago, he was just, laughing out loud, then, the following, he was, turning his head, quietly, wiping his tears away; as he’d accompanied me to my parents, he’d always looked lost, told me, “I’m so envious of you, still have a mom.” Seeing how I was, helping my mom with something, he’d sighed, on how now he’d wanted to, fulfill his filial piety duties to his parents, he was, no longer able to.

At the start of the year, I’d taken my son to clean out the closets, my son asked where those old clothes came from, I’d mentioned it to him, he’d fallen, silent, I don’t know how much he’d understood about the loss that his dad experienced over losing his parents. On the especially colder days, I’d see my husband, take out my father-in-law’s jacket, and put it over his shirt, and I’d known, he was, missing his dad, putting his old clothes on, it was like, he was, in his father’s arms again; I’m sure, that my mother-in-law was more than thoughtful back then, knew my husband’s mind like a child’s, how he would, long for their love for him.

And so, this, is the kindness that’s, passed from one generation to the next, the husband took his father’s clothes from his mother, to ease her mind, and now, whenever he’d missed his parents, he’d, put on the clothes that was passed down to him from his own father, to reminisce how much love they loved him and he loved them too, and that, is the only thing he could, hold on to, because his parents are, both gone…