Are All Taiwanese Girls Like You?

Love’s boundary being, blurred here, and, she still has no way of knowing, if this younger guy liked her, translated…

How Do I Tell Him, that When He’d Asked Me Out, He Looked So Serious, Like a “Man”? That He No Longer Looked Anything Like that Little Boy I Felt Secure with………

A Successful Foreign Relations?

The first time I’d met him from across the straits, his mother who looked only a little bit had him call me “older sister”. I thought, this boy looked so childish, he’s probably not yet twenty? And, him calling me an “older sister”, it’d, made me feel bashful, but, if the first time we’d met, I’d opened with, “I’m old enough to be his mother, he can call me ‘aunty’.”, wouldn’t that be, even more, awkward.

第一次和來自對岸的他碰面,他那看來大我不了幾歲的媽媽,客氣地要他喚我「姊姊」。我...illustration from the papers online…

Later, I’d learned, that his parents divorced when he was quite young, his mother married to Taiwan, while he’d stayed in China with his father, but he wasn’t cherished or loved, and, almost sent into an orphanage, and, in the end, he was, sent to a relative’s to live. And, because I’d felt bad over what he’d gone through, and I’d wanted to show him how welcoming the Taiwanese people are, I’d treated him like he was my younger brother for real, hoping, that there’s nothing but good memories for his time here.

Once at the end of a gathering, I’d asked him if he knew how to take the bus home, he’d told me he didn’t yet, and I’d, told him, “I’ll give you a lift home!”, he was a bit, surprised, but quickly nodded okay. But, we’d, gotten lost! And of course, this was, my fault, forgotten how he just arrived here, that all the streets looked alike, and I’d not confirmed it with him, and, wasted a lot of time.

I kept apologizing to him, but, he’s not, the least bit angry, and told me that he was, in an especially good mood, felt that sitting behind me was like going for a ride, then he’d asked loudly, “Are all the girls in Taiwan like you?”, like me? Because I was busy, trying to find the way, and didn’t want it to become awkward, I’d not asked him further, and stated that, “Taiwanese people are helpful to those in need.

And, it didn’t matter how I’d answered him it seemed, he’d continued ranting on, if that all the girls in Taiwan are like me, then, he’d definitely like the girls in Taiwan, unlike the girls there, all they cared about were themselves, and ignored people. Although I had my back towards him, couldn’t see his face, but, from his lifted tone, I could feel, that he was, very happy. As he’d said, he’d announced further, “I originally hated it here, but because of you, I’m now, in love with Taiwan!”

After hearing all of these “professions of love”, I’d become, flustered. But I’d told myself, that maybe, the people from the Mainland are straight forward, that he probably not meant anything by it, just treat this as a successfully international relation.

Do You Want to Go Out for a Walk Later?

The times we’d met up, although we’d met in groups, he’d especially loved striking up conversations with me, one day he’d even asked me quietly, “Do you want to go out for a bit a little later?”, I’d made up some bullshitting reason, turned him down, not long thereafter, he’d opened up again, “Give me your cell phone number then!”, I’d become, stunned, then, stuttered, “Maybe later.” “Why?”, he’d pressed me, and seeing how I’d grinned so awkwardly, he’d finally, stopped asking me.

I knew he was angry, anybody can get angry, after getting shot down twice. But how do I tell him, that he’d looked so serious, like a man when he’d asked me, he was, no longer that naïve boy with whom I felt comfortable, letting my guards down? I panicked. I was, afraid, what if, I couldn’t, handle it?

And in the end, he’d gone, like that wind, leaving behind, the regrets I’d felt about what happened with him.

Had I just told him, that our age differences is too great…if I can, control my passions toward him more…not led him on…maybe, maybe, he had, only wanted, to make friends with me, perhaps, I’d, read too much into it, and, chosen, to make my escape.

But, that, was it, no amount of assumptions is going to change a thing. And now, I can only, wish that he is, no longer, tied up by those, unpleasantries of his past, no matter where he is, he can, live his days happily.

And, maybe, this woman read too much into the signs, maybe, the guy had, liked her, and, the woman kept her guards down, because she didn’t want to lead this younger man on, and so, she’d, tried to turn him down gently, that, was the only thing she could do, at that time, and now, as she thought back, there’s nothing she could’ve done differently, to know more, and so, all she can wish was that this younger guy is living his life with everything he wants in life.

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Sleeping Beauty, a Poem of Confessions of Love

How can the kiss of D-E-A-T-H be anything that remotely looks like L-O-V-E, huh??? Translated…

How I Longed to be Sleeping Beauty

After You’d Planted that Kiss on My Lips

I Shall, Never Wake Up Again

So, perhaps, you want to stay asleep, so you can, keep dreaming about being kissed by your prince? But, what if, it’s NOT the princes who came to kiss you, but T-O-A-D-S, huh???

here’s that “prince”, kissing sleeping beauty…查看來源圖片from the Disney productions, from online…

 

 

 

 

 

Squandering Away the Love We Once Shared…

We had been, squandering away the love we once shared, thinking, that we will, NEVER run short, but, it’d, run out on us now…

Squandering away the love we once shared, that wasn’t smart, I know it now, but, it’s, too little, too late for us, love’s, already done with you and me, we’d, hurt it too bad, damaged it, to BEYOND even God’s repair now, and so, it just, lay itself down, to D-I-E, while, we’d, cried hard, for it, not to leave us!!!

Squandering away the love we once shared, we shouldn’t have, but, we didn’t know any better, and, the price we’re paying, is having this love we once shared, DIE, before our eyes, and, no matter how hard we’d both cried, we still, don’t have the powers, to bring the DEAD to life, and, we’re, forever, at loss, over this love we’d, once had, but squandered away………

Squandering away the love we once shared, you’d think, that we should’ve, known better by now, but now, that lesson’s still, yet to be learned, the hard way, and, until we lose the love we once cared about so much, having it, YANKED away, out of our grasps, we will, NEVER learn how to appreciate it, and yet, by then, it would be, too late, to get it back again.

 

 

 

Willing, to Walk Down the Aisle, for You

Finding her one true love, someone who’d, stayed by her side, through sickness, injury, who’d still, cherished her very much, translated…

My Tears Felt Heated, as They’d, Rolled Down My Cheeks, and I Couldn’t Find Any Words of Extravagance to Say…

Not Made a Scene, But, Very Memorable

One evening, my boyfriend and I stayed in the hospital wards. Because of the day that followed he’s scheduled his day off, he’d asked my parents to head home to sleep. Then, he’d, slowly, taken out a set of household casual wear from his black sports backpack, with his toothbrush, towel, then, laid them out, neatly and flattened, on the limited surfaces available to him.

That sense of security I received from my boyfriend, was like a serene, but strong kind of an atmosphere. In the six years, we’d, talked about any and everything. I’d once told him, that “in our relationship, I hoped there would be, no secrets”. So, even as we had a fight, we’d, made up on the day of the fight, I can’t feel right, sleeping with the secrets and my own tears.

But, perhaps, it’s due to his family background and his personality traits, that he’d often needed to, have some quiet time for himself first, then, sorted through what he’d needed to say to me. But, I wouldn’t allow it, and, perhaps, I’m, a bit, stubborn. But, slowly, he’d, grown, accustomed to my rules, and learned, how to express his anger towards me.

“Play a song for me!”, I’d, leaned on the bed, and made a suggestion.

“Okay!”, he’d, squinted his eyes, and, was in full smile.

A familiar tune started slow, it was, the “Wedding March”. After a few measures, pop music started playing, then, Andy Lau’s voice, “I will, for you, put on that white gown; I will, for you, walk down that red aisle; I will, build a roof from love for you, to block out the wind and the rain, to carry on in conversations, to make some teas, to play that game of chess, so long, as, you’ll, have me in your life.”

My boyfriend loved Andy Lau, and, as he’d gone to the karaoke, he’d always played and sung the songs by Andy Lau. I got to the point, of having had enough of Andy Lau, and joked, that he was, so full of, cliché, “You should be, the youngest fan of Andy in the whole universe, but, same years as my dad!” But, he always replied with full confidence, “He’s handsome, inside AND out, an idol to me, forever!”

The Most Important Part of My Life

“Walking Down the Aisle, with a white wedding gown, you’re the most beautiful promise of my entire life, I’d, made a pact with you, to count up the stars, and, all your tomorrows too. Walking in the bliss, that bell started, ringing, you are, the most beautiful decision in my whole life, I’d promised to give you all the happiness in the world, in the days in the future, I shall, love you, even more.”

This song, I’d heard, more than hundreds of times, but, being put under anesthesia, and, entered into the bottommost layer of my own dreams, and, drifted along, in the depth of that ocean repeatedly, after I was awakened, being called back out atop, at this moment, I’d, looked at that man, who’s, dark-skinned, with that light in his eyes, smiling like a fool, I’d, had that impulse of, “I do”.

It’s him, he’s, it! I’d wanted, I am willing! And that never-before sense of belonging, that, was what that felt like.

A lot of people say, “marriage is impulsive”, I’d, felt that amazing feeling, of having love rushed, into my head, it’s, so amazing, truly.

illustration from the papers online…圖/江長芳

My tears came down hot, my heart pitter-pattered, I couldn’t say a single word of extravagance. The two of us, stared at one another, and, neither one of us can see each other clearly now.

The past six years, played like that picture show, how we’d met, dated, fallen in love, had our fights, communicated, traveling all over Taiwan, introducing one another to our families, graduating, start to work, enlisting, getting involved in long-distance relationship, fight, traveling abroad, giving one another encouragements, getting injured recently, so many times, we’d, said the most awful of all things to each other, and, several times, we could’ve, broken up. But, six years, we are still, the most important part of one another’s life. This long road we’d, traveled to where we currently are, it wasn’t, the least bit, easy that’s for certain!

“Distance is not a problem. Love wouldn’t become fragile, because of the distance, people would.” the line of one of my favorite movie, “Café on Sixth Alley” stated.

Because our hearts had been true, and, we’d both, cherished what’s happened to one another these past few years, and, even IF we’re displeased with each other, we’d, just put the distances between us, cooled down a bit, then, talk it all out, then, we were, able to, get closer again. Through these fights we’d had, we’d, understood one another even more.

Turns out, the moment that I let love go to my head, wasn’t at the very moment our eyes first met, but, what we’d, weathered through, after all this time. People often, needed to, get to a certain point in their lives, to figure out the meaning of it all.

“Babe……I love you so.”, after the silence of a little over a minute, as the music was, about to stop, I’d, opened up. I’d, opened my arms, wanted him to hug me, he also, got up, walked, toward me. In the end, we’d found our ways, into each other’s arms, and, we’d, cried together.

“If I’m covered with scars all over my body, and no longer pretty, will you still, love me?” I’d sounded, flat, like pretending to be cute, then, I wouldn’t, receive the answer I was, fearing the most.

“Just let us get use to it together.”, he’d replied, in a calm and collected manner, so natural, like, he’d, contemplated on it before.

I’d started, smiling from the inside now.

Although I don’t believe in forever, but, I have the courage, to believe, that every moment of bliss we’d come to share, is true.

And so, you’d, found this man who loved you, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better, or for worse, and it’s really hard, and, through the trials of your life, he’d, stuck by your side, and, you’d, found a gem, someone who will, love you, unconditionally, regardless, of anything, because he loves you!

 

 

 

Our In-Laws from Germany

the union like this one, maybe???  Photo from online…查看來源圖片

Seeing the newlyweds, and the parents of the groom, expressing their love to one another, translated…

With her head of blonde hair, smiling so radiantly, with that sky-blue, red collar dress, she’d looked, very much like a cartoon character out of a Northern Europe animation—and that was, the first impression, our in-law, Emma gave to us. As she saw us, rushing up from Taipei to pick her up, she’d, immediately, gave us hugs, and kisses on our cheeks, and, it’d, lowered that unsettlement of not knowing how to interact with an elder, it’d, made us connected. Hugging is truly, the way, to break the ice between the various cultures that’s for certain! As for the father-in-law, Emma’s dad, he’d, acted, more reserved, I suppose, it’s something to do with his profession, being an attorney and all, he’d worn a light smile, and nodded, to acknowledge us, in a white suit, he’d, resembled Gandalf in Lord of the Rings!

That was the very first time my wife and I’d, gone to a wedding in Europe, and it was, a German-style wedding too, my youngest sister-in-law, Ping, and Abbey Bear is about to walk down the aisle. The loved ones flew in, from all over, my wife’s second eldest sister and we were, “representatives from Taiwan”, we’d taken over ten hours’ flight, from the Netherlands, to Hamburg, then, drove to gather at Copenhagen, six hours away; Abby’s mom and dad took Abby Bear’s classmate’s ride, came from the Sylt on the west of Germany.

with the bride and the groom togehter, pouring itno the same glass!  Photo from online…

The very next morn, the huge group of relatives gathered, to head to the location of the wedding, city hall, and, it truly was, like in the movies, all the way there, we’d, received blessings from strangers. And of course, the happiest was, no other than Abby Bear, for he’d, waited, more than three autumns, to make this forever promise.

Since we’d arrived from Denmark, we saw Abby’s mom leaning close to Abby’s dad. Abby Bear told us, because his mother wanted to cherish every single moment she has with him—Abby’s father was diagnosed with an illness similar to Lou Gehrig’s Disease, couldn’t sit a long time, and, his neck became, weakened too, and so, as they’d heard that Abby Bear was getting married, they were, too excited. As the wedding ceremony draws to an end, hearing the father announcing that Abby and Ping were then, husband-and-wife, Abby’s parents were, grinning ear to ear, like they don’t have, any regrets anymore.

The joyous atmosphere of the wedding extended all the way to the outside of the plaza outside city hall, Abby Bear’s classmate poured the champagne, and, at this time, Abby’s dad, who’s actually, very uptight suddenly, led his friends and families, to sing that folk song in German, to bless the union, they were very moved, and, it’d, moved all the tourists who’d trekked across the plaza. This wedding was like that strong shot of morphine for the two elders, Abby’s dad who’d been sick a long time looked very alive, and, Abby’s mom, looked deep, into his eyes, like they’d, just, fallen in love together.

The westerners’ show of their love for each other, was totally, different from the Asians’. Seeing how Abby’s dad danced around with Abby’s mom, looking deeply, and lovingly into one another’s eyes, it was, such a sight of joy. But, as I’d, looked back toward my wife, she too, was, gazing at me, using that same way too; the way her curled eyebrows looked when she smiled, it was, comparable, to Abby’s mom, and, thinking of how I still have this, teenage girl who’d, loved me, and looked upon me with that sort of admiration, what else, can I ask for in life?

And so, from this experience of a wedding abroad, you’d realized, how the westerners’ show of love is quite different from the easterners’ show of love, but, love is felt, no matter which way you chose to express it.

Magicians in the Marriage, on Filial Relations

How we end up, complimenting one another, making up for the missing parts of one another’s personalities, that’s what made us a perfect fit in marriage, translated…

It wasn’t until I got married, did I discover, that I was, a magician.

On this day, my husband was having troubles, finding his tie. I couldn’t take it anymore, and so, I’d, put my hand into the closets, and, grabbed out that tie he’d been searching for, in the messy closet. My husband hollered out in awe, and claimed, that I must’ve, extended my arms into another space and time, otherwise, how was I able to, find the “missing” that no longer “resided” inside his closets.

Another time, the two of us sat at home, getting bored, there was the news, that someone was coming by for a visit in thirty minutes. I’d put down my cell phone, then, told that soldier to get into the dressing room, then, I’d, immediately started the covering process: cleaning, hiding the items, and, picking up the items scattered around the house, and, as he’d gotten dressed properly, I was already, in the kitchen, preparing the snacks already.

photo from online…

Seeing how he’d only gone in to change, and, the living room already became, spotless, he’d exclaimed, “Honey, you have, magic, right!”, I’d once, contemplated, how I’d become, so “magical” myself. Especially as he’d turned too lazy, and needed me to help him solve his problems a lot, and, I’d hated myself, for answering to his requests. But, think on it, perhaps, the only one he can rely on like this, there’s, just me, and so, other than feeling not wanting to do it, I’d, felt, compelled, to spoil him a little.

Late last night, I’d, stayed up with my detective noel, and, I was reading on how the protagonist had, bumped into the victim in the scary bedroom, and suddenly, a strong wind blew from outside the window, and the sharpened sound gave me the creeps, and I’d, found my way, into his arms. And, him, being, sound asleep, knew that it was my overly active imagination again, he’d soothed me, said, “Told you you’d get scared, and you still read it, you’d, learned your lessons now, huh?”, I’d played coy, and objected, “Well, it’s okay if I get scared, I can run to you and hide in your arms anytime!”

That, is when it’d, dawned on me, that everybody in marriage had, somehow, become one another’s magicians. Because of one another’s needs, we’d, toughened ourselves up, at the same time, because her/his abilities, we’re able to, be weakly because we can be. From the start, what holds the magic, had never been, me, it was, the true love I’d found in him.

a perfect fit ofr each other…not my photo…

And so, this is on how married people will complement each other, because you will make up for the lacking of the other person in the marriage, and, slowly, the two of you, became inseparable two halves of a hole.

A Widow, Back, in the Dating Scene

Attempting, to fill up that void from the death of her beloved husband, by dating men, and this woman still hadn’t figured out exactly, that what she’s missing was inside of her self, and she CANNOT find it outside of her self, with the men she’d been, dating, translated…

The Trophies of the Ballroom Dancing Class

Jie-Ruo, she was the very first friend I’d made in London, she’s passionate, friendly, but her husband, Barry who teaches in a middle school is very quiet, rarely smiled, they’re, totally, opposites.

That year on my birthday, I’d originally asked Jie-Ruo out to lunch to celebrate with me, but that very morn, I’d received a call from our friend, telling me, that Barry had, died of a myocardio infarction the night before.

illustration from the papers online…國標舞班的戰利品潔若,是我到倫敦認識的第一個朋友,她熱情友善,但在中學任教的...

Barry didn’t leave any words behind, and, Jie-Ruo became like a phantom, not knowing, what she is to do now. Thankfully, Barry bought the homeowner’s insurance that’s a part of his life insurance plans, the house is still theirs, the three of them, mother and sons, wouldn’t be out on the streets; the retirement pension of the teachers, his surviving wife can still receive, barely enough, to make ends meet. But, the eldest son just entered into his freshman year in college, and his father died, he’d become, depressed and locked himself up inside, refused, to go back to college for his courses, became a stay-at-home geek; the second son was in his puberty, had emotional ups and downs, and the two children had given Jie-Ruo a ton of headaches. The only consolation was she had two dogs, I’d often gone with her to the parks to walk them, allowed her to pour her heart out to me, to help resolve that loneliness she feels inside after the loss of her husband.

And, five, six years flew by, the kids became, more stabilized, and she’d worked, very hard, to get out from the glooms of the loss of her husband. I’d recommended her to attend the ballroom dancing classes offered by the community center, isn’t that a great place, for single people, to find a partner again?

Not long thereafter, Jie-Ruo came knocking on my doors, with that smile I hadn’t seen crawling up her lips for a very long time, with a yellow Chinese style dress I’d given her as a gift from before, with a gentleman close by. I’d, immediately guessed, that that, was one of the winnings she’d gained, from the ballroom dancing class with the number of women being MORE than the number of men in the class—Richard.

But, Richard, who’s about fifty, is a bit eccentric, he’d lived alone in the countryside, in England, where winters tend to last very long, he’d not had a heater system; sometimes, he’d vanished for a very long while, cut off contact with Jie-Ruo completely, but as Jie-Ruo was going through something like the loss of her mother or aunt, he’d immediately shown up to comfort her. And the way they’d interacted on and off, on and off, with no consistencies, it’d made Jie-Ruo really insecure.

Moving into the New Estate Next to the Beach

After her elder passed on, Jie-Ruo inherited a huge sum of inheritance, at this time, Barry had been gone for ten years, as the kids graduated from college, she’d slowly, become more at ease, more confident too.

One day, as I was walking the dogs with her at the park, as we’d carried on in casual conversation, a Tony popped up. “Sorry, who’s Tony again?”, I recalled, that after Richard, there was, John, Simon……………

I saw that light of happiness flickering in Jie-Ruo’s eyes, as she’d chimed on, “Tony is a partner in my ballroom dancing class. He took care of his ailing wife for many years, became a widower just last year. He is very funny and outgoing, I’m really happy with him. You know, I have this dream, of living close to the seas, and Tony was willing to sell his estate, and I, using a part of my mother’s inheritance, we’d, bought a mansion by the seas together. Actually, we’d already found a property, if we break up, or there were issues on the inheritance right for the children, we’d found an attorney to draft up the wills already too……………” as she’d talked, she’d become, more and more excited.

I thought, man, you are, a widow that just refuse to settle down, back then, Barry, was too quiet, perhaps, Tony, who’s very outgoing and upbeat can make you happy. It’s just, that not knowing each other for six months yet, and you’re already, buying an estate together, are you sure you thought this thing through completely? But, seeing how happy Jie-Ruo was talking about this, I couldn’t possibly, rain on her parade.

Just as they were about to buy their estate together, Jie-Ruo came to me, with worries on her face, “Tony is very ill now, maybe, it’s, cancer…………”, I’d felt that tightening in my heart, my dear Jie-Ruo, why do you have such bad luck, you’re about, to take on, a sick, ailing, and even, dying man.

But, they’d already signed the papers for the house, they can’t turn back now, and so, they’d, followed the plans, Jie-Ruo took her two Papillons, Tony, with his huge German shepherd, they’d, moved in to that new house on the beach. The three dogs got along quite well, and, Jie-Ruo took good care of Tony like she’d promised. And, thankfully, after the health exams, Tony didn’t have cancer, but a heart condition, and all he’d needed was, rest.

But, living together, it’d, caused the frictions, and how to split up the costs, and, the methods of dealing with their separate children weren’t consistent enough, they’d started fighting a lot, and, a little over a year, they’d, sold the property, and split up.

“It’s been so many year, I’d gotten fearful, of living this life alone. Steven who’s very straight-forward was, my Forrest Gump, he’d danced with me, gone out with me on walks, and we’d, gotten along quite well with each other. Life, is all about, being happy in the now, who knows what’ll happen tomorrow, right?”

I’d, squeezed her hand, knew her heart, she’d been through the trials of losses from death, so, what if, she’s, dating a lot right now, right?

And so, this, is what this woman learned, from the losses in her life, she’d attempted to fill up that void that came with the loss of her beloved husband, with other men, and it might work for a short while, as the article showed, but, because this widow didn’t dig DEEP enough inside of herself, to find out WHY exact it is that she fears being alone, her relationships will always be, short-lived…