Wine Glass, a Short Prose

Looking back, perhaps, she had, fallen for him, but, she doesn’t feel that way, now that he wanted a softer place to land!  Translated…what her heart looked like, as she’d gone to his wedding…not my photo…

On his birthday party, he announced he was getting married soon.  Her hands slipped, the wine glass shattered to the ground, making the sound resembling that of a heart breaking.  Everybody thought she had a crush on him, that she’d felt impacted, that, was why she’d, dropped the glass, and so, they’d started, gossiping about her after they finished their meals.  She’d come to the understanding, that if she’d explained herself, it’d only make things worse, so, she’d not said anything.  Several years later, he became unhappy in his marriage, and rang her doorbell, and wanted a soft place to land with her, she’d told him, that she’d not liked him one bit.  Naturally, he’d not believed her.  And so, she’d told him, that she’s, with someone now, and showed him a photo.  Then, he’d, turned around and left, he’d, believed in the lie she’d told him.

what his heart looked like, after he was divorced from his wife…shattered heart 的圖片結果not my picture…

So, maybe, this woman wanted this man who should’ve chosen her to marry suffer, that, was why, she’d turned him away, or maybe, years had gone by, and what she felt for him, was no more, or maybe, she’d come to her senses, in realizing, that what she felt towards him was only, a crush, that it wasn’t ever going to last…and this man showed what a LOSER he was, searching for a soft place to land with this woman who’d shattered her wine glass at his wedding.

Advertisements

Chasing Down Regrets, a Poem

The understandings that came a bit late, translated…

Many Years Later

They Finally Come to the Understanding

That The Island Snowing

The People Going Crazy Over the Snows

The Day the Snow Covered Up the Lands

Was the Very First Day

of The End

If only you know what you didn’t know then, that, is regret, and, no matter how hard you’d recalled, how hard you’d longed, for those moments of mistakes in the past made by you back again, you can’t, have your lives, to do over again, and, if you keep on looking back, you’ll end up, missing out on the rest of your lives, but hey, what can you do?  You were the ones, who’d made that very first, initial WRONG step, and every single step afterwards, was to make up for that very FIRST mistake you’d ever made.

Searching in the Darkness, for Recent Memories…

I’d been searching in the dark lately, quite a lot, actually, for recent memories, any one, but, no matter how I WRECKED my brains, nothing surfaces to my mind.

Searching in the darkness, for recent memories, don’t you know, that memories only exist, where we can see?  And that, the darkness, that place, was saved, for the forgotten, the gone-away, memories…

what do you think you’ll be finding like this, huh???  Not my photograph.

Searching in the darkness, for recent memories, I’d looked up (not that I can tell which way’s up or down, it’s dark???  Hello, hello, hello???), and then, down, it’s just, not going well these days!  Searching in the darkness, for recent memories, any one of them would do, but NO, there IS none, NOT since you’d left me hanging high, and dry!

Searching in the darkness, for recent memories, and yet, what, do I find?  Absolutely, NOTHING, and, you KNOW that you can’t see diddily SQUAT without light, unless, of course, you’re, a nocturnal creature…what do you think you’ll be finding like this, huh??? Not my photograph.

Waiting, on a Dream…

Waiting, on a dream, that, is where you’d, left me, high and dry, way back when, and I’d, waited, blindly, believed that this dream, which turned out to be, a L-I-E, was, NEVER going to make.

Waiting, on a dream, that, is what it’d, felt like, being in love, never knowing, when this love will turn, upward, or downward, or if, it’s going to do that tilt-a-whirl thing that’ll make me, throw up like crazy at any time!

waiting on a dream 的圖片結果like climbing up these never-ending stairs, not my illustration.

Waiting on a dream, but why?  I’m not stupid you know!  Waiting on a dream, that’s something, only the young AND the naïve (yes, you must possess both of these “qualities”…) can have the luxuries of, for the rest of us, we simply, can’t afford it.

Waiting on a dream, for so long now, and, knowing it’s nowhere NEAR, comin’ true, became a part of my everyday life, and yet, I’d wondered at times, late at night, why, I’m still, waiting on………you???  Just can’t, quite figure it all out is the thing.

an empty park bench 的圖片結果

like this, perhaps???  Not my photograph…

Waiting on a dream, no more, I won’t, wait again, been waiting, my whole life, for that train (or that ship???) that’s already, left where I was, and now, perhaps, it’s, my time, to march onward, with the rest of my life, instead of, getting, trapped by these moments, in my past………

The Day & Night Cafe, No. 4

Life, as a fake, translated…

After Sipping Up that Final Sip of Café Vienna, I’d Gotten Up

Decided to Take the Trains Southbound to Vienna in the Night, He, Who’s Japanese-German

Fluent in German, Recalled How His People Were Defeated in World War II

Life was Like an Auction, with the Highest Bidders Winning

like this???  Not my photograph…

And, After the War, Those Who’d Made the Low Bids Dropped out One by One

The Two Still Standing, Fighting to Win;

The Auctions of Love is Full of Dangers

The Auctioneers can Only Laugh & Make Fun of Themselves

And, There May be, Falsified Love Here as Well

We Needed to Wait Until the Show’s Over to Know the Truth

Understanding, How Every Move is Hinting at Something Else

Like a Kiss, that was, a Kiss Goodbye

A Hug, for the Final Last Time

which one is the real me, I’m totally confused here!  Not my photograph…

That Keyring of Happiness, is a Memorabilia

Continuous, the Beginning is the End, the End, Beginning

But, I Couldn’t Get at, that Tear I’d, Wiped Off My Cheeks

From that Bath I’d Taken Before

Pushing the Doors Outward, Feeling the Fourth & Fifth Spinal Column Ache Lightly

Was Virgil, Was Aldermann, Elderly?

Must be, Confused with the Time then?  Everyone Was Once Young & Pretty

The Young Lovers, Flew Away Together, But it Never Lasts, He’d Insisted

the distorted versions of the self, not my artwork…

That Giving Up is Not Giving in, She Does, Love Him, Just Couldn’t, be with Him Forever

Turned Out, that Was, Their Last Time, Especially, Arousing, Especially, Sexual

He’d Walked Toward the Crowd in the Clock Tower, Fully Dressed

The Fakes Looked Good on the Outside, and Only He Knew, His Own, Worthlessness

Afterwards, there Shall be, No Clocks, No Way to Tell Time

Nobody Shall, Ever Know, Nothing Had, Happened Here

So, this, is someone’s realizations, that everything s/he desired, was absolutely, NOTHING of importance, and, instead of changing the ways, changing one’s own behaviors, this character just, keeps on living, in the untrue forms of himself…

I’m a Security Guard, and All I Ask For, is a Little Bit of Dignity

Off the Front Page Sections, translated…

Recently, there was an incident of beating by a resident of the homeowner’s board and the murdering of a security guard in Hsinbei City, and it’d, touched me.

There are more and more people working in the security guard industries, but, the status quos are lowered, and they’re, not getting the recognitions they deserved, a lot of people looked down on those who work as security guards, and, believed that there’s no future in the work as a security guard.  Once the security guard gets hired, he’d become an employee; especially in the residential buildings, they’d needed to, follow the commends of the residents, getting controlled by the homeowner associations, needed to watch people’s faces, and pay close attention to the ups and downs of the residents.  As they’re on duty, they’d needed to show their care and concerns, and couldn’t offend the residents, and needed to handle an assortment of business that occurred in the residences, they’re often, living under great duress.  And, the better residents would show the security guards more respect, and, there are those bad residents who would make troubles for them too, blaming them for not doing their job well enough at all, and even, beating and hackings too.long hours, with miminum pay, not my photo…

The security guards’ work is around the clock, 24/7, and, no matter what the weather was like, they’d needed to go to work, and are under enormous duress, more frankly stated, the wages earned by the security guards are among the lowest, in correspondences to their workloads, with long hours, other than the most basic wages, there are, rarely any raises, increases in their pays, or other bonuses or discounts to speak of.  But most of the workers do it without any complaints, and just, stay on their work post dutifully.

Currently, the population makeup of security guards composed of members of the younger generations who couldn’t find better work, along with some who are already retired but preferred to stay busy in their lives, and those who’d needed the extra paychecks too.  Although they don’t get paid as much, and, the level of work is considered a bit lower, but just like workers in any other industries, they’d, worked hard, to earn their own separate living.  Think about it: if a building is without any security guards, then, it would be quite, dangerous, wouldn’t it?  And this showed, the importance of the work of these individuals.

And, I hope, that the residents, the public can, show a little more respect to the security guards working, or maybe even, a little bit more encouragements; especially, I’d hoped, that the government can improve the working conditions of the security guards as well, so they can have a safer environment to work in.

watching over the local communities here…not my photograph…

So, this is based off of someone’s observations, and, the individual is right, on how the long hours, and the hard works put in by the security guards were often, taken for granted, because we expect these people who worked for us to do what they’re supposed to, and, we’re, paying them for watching over our communities, we often believed, that we can be mean to them, because they’re under us, as we’d, hired them, but hey, they might be able to, get higher paying jobs, and just, chose to, work in our buildings, keeping us safe.

The Interlude of Love in Our Fourth Year of Middle School

The young and in love, of course, these are, only passages in our lives, they’re not, meant to last, are they???  Nope!  Translated…

Perhaps, This Would be, the Very Last Ten-Minutes We Ever Get to Walk Together………

The Beginning of an Unknown World

This place, “the fourth year of middle school”, it’s definitely, a unique experience for the youths who were involved in it during that era of time.  Regularly, it was after we’d all graduated from middle school, but we’d continued, wearing those uniforms every single day, and pretended to go to school daily, it’s just, that the location where classes held was no longer on campus, but in this 50-centimeter space that’s tightly cramped.  But for me and Jack, it was, the start of our trip away from home, getting to know a foreign world, we’d both believed back then, that this was only, a year-long temporary thing in Taipei, which helped us to become, more adventurous in life as we got older.

young and in love, not my photograph…

That year, we both had our separate failed ventures in love.  We fell for two sisters from Shijr, I think they were, cousins.  Although we’d felt attracted to them, but, based off of the conditions back then, we couldn’t do anything about the attractive feelings, and so, after our cram school sessions, we’d accompanied them on the ten-minute walk from the classes to the train stations in Songshan, during those short ten-minutes we’d come to share, it’d become, the happiest time we’d ever had in our fourth year of middle school.

Jack loved the older girl, but, their differences in height was too enormous, the girl was 5’8, while Jack was only 5’5, every time I’d walked behind them, it was, like watching the temple deities making their parades, but, because they’d bickered a lot, it’d, added to those harder days of our youth, and for the year, we’d both followed behind them, watched how things played out with them, sometimes, we’d laughed until our stomachs hurt, and sometimes, we’d caught each other’s gazes, and, seemed, to have a lot to say to one another, but, we’d, suppressed the urges to talk, and just, walked on quietly.

Don’t Forget How You Feel at This Precise Moment in Time

The final day of our fourth year in middle school, the four of us maintained our usual formation, walked toward the Songshan Train Station.  But we all knew, that perhaps, this would be, the very last time, we walked together for the ten-minutes, and, the tall and short who’d fooled around and horse-played both, settled down.  The very first time, Jack and I bought the tickets, and followed the sisters into the station to wait.  As the train came in, I knew, that if I don’t say something, then, it would be, too late, but I’d not spoken a single word.  Before she got on, the younger cousin turned her head around, said to me, “Goodbye”, god DAMN it, I still didn’t have enough courage to say anything, I’d just, nodded my head toward her.

teenagers in love 的圖片結果like this???  Not my photo…

Before the train started, I’d quickly taken out the sketch I’d made secretly in class of the younger cousin’s side profile, and handed it to her who found a window seat, that was the very first time, that she’d stared me in the eyes, and, flashed that enchanting smile at me.  The train moved, and the older girl tilted her head out the window, and called out “Jack!”, Jack attempted to run to keep up, but the train already, sped out of the station, I saw Jack’s panting backside, and there seemed, to be tears, mixed in his sweats, this was, probably, the very first time I ever saw Jack cry.

Before we left Taipei, we did something together, celebrated our birthdays together.  We were both, Taureans, born in the month of May, eight days apart, we’d bought ourselves a small cake, with one candle on it, we sat at the bus depot at the back of the train station and made a wish together.

“Although we’re dirt poor right now, but, we’d, shared some great times together, we will, NEVER forget how we both feel at this  precise moment.”

“I hope we will sit in different countries, and celebrate our birthdays together.”

so young, these kids, and yet, the love they’d found, are the purest…not my picture still…

“Are we going to be sitting, in the different bus stations of the different countries?”

“Ha, that sounds very cool too!”

“We must work hard, to make names of ourselves, work hard, and we will, succeed!”

So, these are the days of our youths, we’d found that first taste of love, but, because at the end, we’d needed to grow up and part ways, but, the memories of our shared moments will always stay alive in each of us, like it was, yesterday!